the last season

the last season

I never got around to posting my outfit photos from NYFW last season and now that I won't be able to attend any shows because of the new covid world we are living in, I look back at these memories with extra fondness. I had made the decision a while ago to redirect my career in fitness and I slowly started to spend less time in NYC as I focused on building connections here at home where I could train, get certified, and start teaching classes. The process happened faster than I thought it would take and within months, I had a full schedule with three different gyms. I began other workouts for cross-training and my body began to change. Everyone told me that I looked stronger and healthier but it also played a huge role in why I ultimately decided that I had to choose between fashion and fitness. While I know that I'm not considered overweight by any means, I also know that my body is no longer the ideal type in the fashion world. I hadn't changed anything else in my life - my diet was the same and I still did the same amount of cardio but dance fitness was no longer the only thing in my life anymore - and for so many years, that was the only thing that had really kept me so thin. I get on the scale every now and then just to see where I am and I can't imagine being 20 lbs lighter. I still struggle with how my body has changed over the past year but I love what I'm doing now - I love the various workouts, the fact that I'm strength training, and that I actually enjoy running and sculpting - and I wouldn't give any of it up just to be that skinny again. In these photos, my body is already starting to look different but my humble opinion is that I am still rocking this outfit regardless.

A more important aspect of fashion that I learned, which really opened my eyes thanks to the projects I was doing and the styling shoots I got to be involved in throughout the last 4 years, was how unsustainable this beautiful world of fashion really is. Almost all of the textiles goes into the landfills every year. Fashion production in itself makes up 10% of the worlds carbon emissions, dries up water sources, and pollutes our oceans. So many tons of microfibers end up in the ocean - equivalent to 50 billion water bottles. Many of the textiles are not even biodegradable. With fashion, collections change so quickly - I mean, fashion week showcases next seasons styles within 5 months of each other. Becoming more knowledgable of all these facts made it harder to turn the other cheek. I only spent three months in London for fashion design and I know it requires tremendous creativity, technical skills, and the perseverance to fight and make it in a cut-throat environment where very few become successful. So, of course, I have the utmost respect for this world - but it probably is not the right one for me to be so involved in. When I was looking into transferring for my last year in fashion school, FIT was just rolling out new courses in sustainable fashion and if I ever find time to make my way back, this would be a course I would want to study. I feel so inspired by Reformation and how their entire line revolves around sustainable fabrics so it's definitely doable to alter the industry but would require a tremendous shift within both commercial and high fashion brands.

Not being able to be part of NYFW for the first time in 4 years will feel different. Sad. Even as things changed in my life, this was the one constant I had that tied me to the amazing experiences I had in what I can only describe as a whirlwind affair with fashion. I still think about that day I flew to NYC just hours after my ninth 14 hour shift. I was exhausted but excited to be starting my first day at FIT in the afternoon. I think about that special person who just happened to be standing in front of me at the coffee shop across the street from the school, I think about how maybe if I hadn't dropped my wallet, he would never have started a conversation with me. And without that conversation, I wouldn't have been offered to help assist at a magazine shoot the following week - the most random and unexpected opportunity presented to me that ended up opening doors upon doors. I know all things come to an end but I'm hoping that I can still find something that will connect me to this industry that I love so much - but in a more responsible and healthy way.

the year we didn't ask for

the year we didn't ask for

I decided to rewrite this entry because originally, I let myself be a little too raw about how this year has been. I think we all know how shitty this world has been these last few months so instead, I deleted everything and decided that I'd focus on something more positive. My beautiful friend just lost her husband to complications from the coronavirus - and I mean he truly suffered in the worst possible way in the 93 days he was in the ICU - from having his leg amputated, dialysis, strokes, sepsis, lung infections, having a pacemaker placed, being put in a medically induced coma and needing a double lung transplant to survive. The point of what I'm saying is that through it all, my friend has been the most positive and strong woman from day 1 to now, where she is readjusting to life as a widow and single mom to a one year old baby, all while grieving at the same time but never without a smile on her face and encouraging us to live our lives and find happiness every day that we are here on earth. It just felt wrong to complain about things when someone who has gone through hell and back is out there making every day count and so that's what I'm striving to do here as well.

I've recently left my job as a nurse on the covid task force and instead am looking at other opportunities that would allow me to be happier. I know how that sounds but I've always been an advocate for happiness. The one thing that has changed for the better is the fact that I am now a coach at [solidcore], which has been one of my favorite workouts and a dream of mine since becoming a fitness professional. I auditioned two years ago and did not make it but I told myself to keep trying and now it's happened and I am extremely proud. I do feel a bit cheated out of the experience since I've fulfilled this dream during a pandemic. Everything has been different and difficult as we navigate through these uncharted waters.

In an effort to redirect this blog so that it isn't solely on fashion, I want to start sharing other aspects of my life that have become just as important... because all the muffins and oreo truffles I have perfected during quarantine deserves its moment. And also since I haven't been in NYC, my fashion sense has somewhat become a little less chic and less black. Unfortunately, all that these photos do for me is make me look like I'm 24 years old hanging out on a wannabe platform 9 3/4. Bear with me while I figure out how to dress myself again after spending months in a sports bra and yoga pants.

When you aren't a runner

When you aren't a runner

Just a random post to let you know how much I hate running. Actually, maybe not hate because  lately it's been kind of enjoyable with the cooler weather but in general, my feelings for running are not very positive. And mostly because it's hard.

Over the past few years, as I started taking more fitness classes and then became a certified instructor for different formats, my classes have always been high intensity/high cardio. And I gravitate towards workouts that are the same. I teach back to back classes and recently over the past few months started cross-training at solidcore. So I figured when I joined the solidcore family to run the Rock n Roll DC marathon (or in my case, half), I thought that I was going to be in good enough condition to start training to run long distance... which I haven't done in exactly 10 years. But I couldn't be more wrong.

Running is miserable. Miserably hard. I'm hitting 3-5 miles and then just can't push any further or can't get mentally enthusiastic to try. So I'm wondering if anyone reading this is a runner and would be willing to offer some tips? Maybe even songs to put on a playlist that gets them going? Running groups/clubs... are they worth it? And good tips for when the weather starts getting colder? I'm definitely an outdoor runner and probably will not get on a treadmill during the winter unless I really have to. Feel free to message me on instagram, FB, email, anywhere! And thanks in advance!

And just because it's September, here I am whipping out the denim jacket and boots as if my heart isn't secretly shattering into a million pieces because the days are getting shorter and I could live with summer all year long.

the time I remembered I had a blog (again)

the time I remembered I had a blog (again)

Dusting off this blog with a fun, playful look from none other than a great company I love representing: Zara.  I know its been radio silence here for over a year but other than the new extra 20lbs I've brought along with me, I've just been doing what seems to be what I'm always doing; untangling myself from the confusion over what I want to do, figuring out what brings me real joy, and navigating living a life that is meaningful. I want to say it's the gemini in me - just constantly being in a state of flux. And truthfully, it's exactly what this past year has looked like. I came home and settled back in DC where I started my fitness career - teaching non-stop and really honing in on other workouts to cross-train. I took up another nursing job after I swore up and down I would never do again. But there I was - opening up an office in Arlington from the ground up, recruiting and hiring nurses, and providing free vaccines to students in the county. It was the best nursing gig I ever had. And just recently, I completed real estate classes in DC. 

So I think it's probably safe to say that I'm most likely going to start branching this blog out into other aspects of my life rather than it being exclusively for fashion (but after fashion week because let's be honest, I live for all of that) For example, maybe it's also because I'm 33 but I feel that it's important, and quite possibly a life skill, that everyone knows a good recipe for chocolate cheesecake muffins or a blueberry lemon cake. Am I right, or am I right? 

Shirt: Metallic Effect Top

Shoes: Slingback Heels w/Studded Bow

spring things

spring things

It's supposed to be spring tomorrow and I see snow in the forecast. WHAT. THE. HECK.

That being said, there was that one time where I switched outfits for an event during the middle of winter and pretended it was warm out when in actuality, it was cold AF. But this post is appropriate because even with the snow and cold weather still in our near future, these are some of my favorite spring things (to look forward to): polka dots, midriffs, and freakin SCRUNCHIES. I never thought they would be cool again but they're baaaaack and I'm going to wear them like its 1996. Crossing my fingers for a butterfly clip comeback next!

NYFW Outfit: Second Pick

NYFW Outfit: Second Pick

Like many others out there, Beyonce is kind of my spirit animal. Whenever her song comes on or she's performing on tv, something takes over me and I feel like I AM the queen. Like I can do anything I want and I can be anyone I wanna be. What a boss ass betch, that Bey. So it really wasn't surprising that the moment I got to wear this dress, my inner Sasha Fierce came right out, but you know, in a more classy and demure manner since it was an Alice McCall show that I went to.

By the way, anyone else living for the bows, scrunchies, and headbands that are trending back again? I've been waiting for a scrunchie comeback for years and I'm so excited that IT'S. FINALLY. HERE.

Yes to the bow, yes to the all the bling that makes this dress shine bright like a diamond, and yes to my legs because when else will I ever get to wear something like this again?

NYFW Outfit

NYFW Outfit

I'm late to the party here but New York Fashion Week, I just really love you. It's fun to see the newest trends but mostly, it's fun to see how festive it becomes for everyone. New York street fashion is on another level. It's inspiring, it's creative, it puts a big smile on my face. Over the next few days, I hope to post my favorite outfits I wore to the shows. This is my first pick because I love the cab hat and combat boots. It's a nice twist to a dainty dress. I'm pretty much obsessed with this because never in my life would I have thought that I'd ever wear combat boots. (Just kidding. My 18 year old Myspace self would have worn them. But also my 18 year old Myspace self went through some punk/emo/goth phase that nobody really knew about.)

As some of you know, I started fashion school back in 2016 at FIT and then last summer, I got to study design in London. To make a long story short, I've been learning a lot of what I like and after a lot of thought, I had to say goodbye to FIT this year. The good news is that I transferred to another school and as luck would have it, I can complete my fashion degree in only two semesters! This is pretty huge for me since I'll be 32 in a few months and being in school for much longer isn't something I want to do. The bad news is I missed the fall deadline so I won't be back in the city I love until next spring. But thankfully I'm still working and booking projects so while I won't be living in NYC at least I'll still be able to do work up there.

In the meantime, I'm teaching dance fitness and a fusion of pilates, boxing, and ballet barre while I'm in DC for the majority of the next nine months. So here's a shameless plug for me to invite you all to take my classes and get a fun workout in while burning some serious calories. Message me if you're interested!

New Year, New Coat

New Year, New Coat

I've recently started cycling and one of my favorite instructors said that she thought New Year resolutions were bullshit. And I kind of loved her for that. 

I have never been the one to actually follow through on any resolutions I make. It's a struggle to even follow through my plans for the week, whether it be cooking a meal that I've set my heart on, or even sometimes waking up early enough to workout. Sometimes I'm so crappy that I cancel out on plans because I'd rather be in my pajamas while watching Dateline in bed... even though I keep telling myself that it'd be nice to make an effort to be social once in a while. 

Truthfully, if I can make it through this life being a better version of myself than I was last year, or even just yesterday, I think it's good enough for me. I realize that every day is a gift and if I can just be kind to myself, kind to the people I love, kind to those I am fortunate enough to meet during my time here on earth... and do things every single day that make me happy, then that seems like a win all around in my book. The triumphs that have made me feel accomplished this past year have all happened to me because I was doing something I enjoyed and therefore was (kind of) good at. It might not have paid me as well, or it wasn't considered 'stable' enough on paper, but I was living my best life. And shouldn't life ought to feel that good? (Or maybe it just feels good to be vague?) So, no real resolutions for me this year. 

Except maybe just eat more tacos.

This post sponsored by Forever21 

This color coat is sold out, but you can get the same coat in taupe here 

Three Ways to Style a Basic Black Sweater

Three Ways to Style a Basic Black Sweater

Whenever I go out to buy winter essentials, a basic black sweater is always on top of my list. It may seem less than exciting but its secret is that it is every stylists dream because of its ability to be infinitely versatile.  I can go from day to night, casual to a little more dressed up all at once. Whenever I think, I have NOTHING to wear!, I talk myself off that ledge and pull out the sweater because actually I do have something to wear... and I can mix and match things already in my closet and look like I'm wearing a new outfit each time. It's genius, to be honest. 

Here I have my favorite basic black sweater (turtleneck too, mind you) and I've gone ahead and styled it three different ways. What I love about each look is that it can be transitioned to day to night easily depending on where you go. This is a major plus for me! If I can wear the same outfit all day, I'm sold.

Look 1: Oversized Pants

It may seem strange to want to pair an oversized sweater with oversized pants but it works. I can't tell you how much I love this look because of the fact that its incredibly comfortable but also makes me feel chic. It's very New York but the pants are kind of LA. Do you know who Tania Sarin is? She lives in wide leg pants and is my favorite fashion blogger on the west coast. I feel like we could be soul sisters in this outfit. Actually, scratch that. We most definitely are soul sisters. 

Look 2: The Mini 

Black sweaters have a  99.999% chance of looking good paired with a mini skirt. Feeling cold? Throw on some tights, wear over-the-knee boots... you really can't go wrong. Again, this outfit makes me feel chic but also sexy at the same time. 

Look 3: Jeans 

The most obvious pairing! The trustworthy jeans! My usual go-to for sweaters are almost always jeans (sometimes with yoga pants too, if we're honest) Since I was planning to go from day to evening out, I brought along a leather jacket and wore some nice warm Gucci loafers for some pizzaz. 

#mycalvins

#mycalvins

Cheers to all the models out there rocking their underthings, bikinis, and whatever have you without feeling nervous and a little self-conscious because if you ever partnered with a brand and felt any of those things.... SAME, GIRL. But I wasn't going to say no to Calvin Klein because its Calvin Klein and wearing their underwear is something I already do and genuinely love. It's Calvin Klein or nothing at all.

Boots and a Boost

Boots and a Boost

Fall is my favorite time of the year. I've already baked apple bread last night and if you know me at all, my love for honeycrisp apples is so strong, I could live off of them during this season. Transitioning from summer to fall is quite fun because you can start wearing those oversized sweaters and pair it with a skirt, which is exactly what I've done here. Nothing makes me happier than an oversized sweater and a honeycrisp apple.

Just kidding.

Boots. Boots also make my heart sing. For awhile, I didn't know what kind of boots looked good on me and I experimented with just about every style from booties, to ankle, to knee-length. And to be perfectly honest, my preference for boots would change over the years depending on what I was into (style-wise for clothes) and how my body looked at that time... in particular, my legs. The shape of my legs have transformed quite a bit from them being swollen for over a year when I was going through Lyme Disease, from them being a little bit heavier when I was not as physically active, to being a bit leaner now that I am more attentive to my health. All of this has played a part in choosing the right boots that complimented my shape despite what was trending.

These amazing over-the-knee boots are my first pair at this length and I could not love them more. They add a sultry vibe to any outfit, whether it be a dress, skirt, or even on top of jeans. Oh and did I mention that they make your legs look extra long? Personally, I think they would have looked wonderful on all the body transformations I have gone through throughout the years had I only had the confidence to try. So here's to you, whoever you are... in case you're going through body transformations of your own. If there's something you've always wanted to wear but felt insecure about it, now is the time to go for it! Confidence is everything and I have a sneaky feeling that you're going to look absolutely fabulous ;)

Boots: Marc Fisher Praye Over The Knee Stretch Boot

summer kicks

summer kicks

If there's one shoe that I'm always wearing this summer, it might surprise you that it isn't a pair of flip flops. It's actually a brand that I've been wearing since I was a kid - a good old pair of Keds. I used to have them in every color and can even remember how I would color coordinate my Keds with my biker shorts/oversized loose tee aka my staple 90s attire.

Well, I'm bringing my beloved childhood shoes back into my life. I recently ordered a new pair and as luck would have it, it came to my doorstep 20 minutes before I left for the airport. There wasn't a need to break them in as they were already super comfortably and offer a lot of support. They walked all over the streets of London through the good times and the bad (thanks London rain) and even though they're white, they were a breeze to clean when I ran through dirty puddles and watched them turn from white to black.

I'm wearing the Chillax Basics because I'm 31 now and don't believe in laces. And also because you can just slip them on and run out the door in a seconds which is perfect for the woman on the go.

Shop yours here! Shoe is true to size.

Shoes: Keds Chillax Basics in White

minister marie and jumpsuits too

minister marie and jumpsuits too

Random story:

Last night, my friend and I were discussing his wedding. There isn't a date set yet and he's not really religious. Long story short, I started researching alternative officiants for him and shortly after, I somehow ended up becoming ordained online (non-denominational) and am now legally able to officiate weddings... and funerals and house blessings too, among other things. I, myself, was raised Catholic but somehow through my adult years, I guess you can say I've become more of just a spiritual individual. And now it looks like I'll be officially officiating his wedding which is an honor but also quite hilarious. At least for me. But to be honest, after giving it some thought, I actually think I might want a close friend or family member to officiate my wedding one day. You know, if I actually get married and settle down one day faaaarrrrrrrr in the future. But hopefully not too far where my ovaries have completely expired but far enough. 

By the way, I can totally see my twenty-three year old self shaking her head at me regarding marriage. We have opposing views. 

Wearing: 

Jumpsuit: Forever21 Floral Wide Leg Jumpsuit

on being 31

on being 31

Over the weekend, I celebrated my thirty-first birthday. I spent the day with my parents who drove up to New York. When they asked what I wanted to do to celebrate, there was really only one thing on my mind: Smorgasburg. Because it's my birthday and I'll eat what I want. 

Smorgasburg in Brooklyn on a sunny weekend day is what my dreams are made of, especially when all you want to do is wear stretchy shorts and sit out in the grass to bask in the glory of all the food you've managed to carry with two hands. My favorites that I would definitely want to eat again would probably be the ramen burger and the mango flower with chili. It's exactly what it sounds like...  a mango cut into the shape of a flower, topped with chili. And it's pure magic. In leu of a birthday cake, I ate an ice cream cone wrapped in a cloud of cotton candy the size of my head. You absolutely must visit Wu Kong in NYC to experience this because it's freakin WORTH IT. 

And since I'm 31 and as old as moldy cheese, I did what any old person would do on their birthday. I put  in an application for an apartment in the East Village.  I know, its a mission I've been on for quite some time now. Well, you guys, I'm here to tell you that this is most likely not the end of the road as many others applied for the same apartment at the same time I did. If I could roll my eyes any harder... 

I'm still so very thankful for the past year as I've had so many great opportunities in this crazy world of fashion and can't believe I'll be heading to London next month to design athletic wear! And the greatest birthday gift of all is booking a project in the Bahamas! I'll have more information on it soon but it's safe to say in the words of Jessie Spano: I'M SO EXCITED!!! 

Wearing: 

Crop Top & Pants: Papaya Clothing Striped Palazzo Set

Kodak series: Ireland 1999

Kodak series: Ireland 1999

The other night, I was going through some old photo albums and came across old pictures that I took from a disposable camera when I was still in middle school. I didn't realize how long I actually used disposable cameras (up until my freshman year of college in 2004!) because it's  hard to think there was a time in my life when I didn't have an iPhone. I think these photographs are precious so I wanted to share some of my travel photos that my 12 year old self took. This particular post is about the time I went to Ireland.... for a pair of shoes. 

I was in seventh grade when I saw Riverdance for the first time on VHS. I had already been dancing for years at this point and tap was my jam. Whatever they were doing on Riverdance just looked like a more challenging version of all the shuffle-ball-changes I was doing in tap class but I was all about it. I wanted to learn. And as it turns out, finding an Irish dance studio was pretty easy in our area. Go figure. Long story short, when I transitioned from soft shoe to hard shoe in class, my mom and I decided to take a weekend trip to Ireland so I could get the best hard shoe (or if we're being honest, we just wanted an excuse to go to Ireland). My dad works for the airlines so we were lucky to be able to hop on a plane whenever we wanted for free. 

The unfortunate thing about traveling when you're still young is that you're not as appreciative of the amazing opportunity to be immersed in another culture and in my case, I can't really remember what I did or what I saw other than being incredibly excited about getting a new pair of dance shoes. But I do have these photos and it gives me a window into what my 12 year old self thought was interesting and unique in Dublin. And I got to say, it's quite sweet.